Once again we see that when it comes to certain issues, intolerance and close-mindedness are alive and well in certain quarters:

A 15-year-old Wisconsin boy who wrote an op-ed promoting gay adoptions was censored, threatened with suspension and called ignorant by the superintendent of the Waukee School District, according to an attorney representing the child.

Mathew Stevens, the founder of the Lambda Counsel, sent a letter to Superintendent Todd Carlinson demanding an apology for “Its unconstitutional and irrational censorship and humiliation” of Brandon Waggoner.

Waggoner, a student at Waukee High School, was asked to write an op-ed for the school newspaper about whether gays should be allowed to adopt. Waggoner, who is describes himself as a free-thinker, wrote in support of the issue. Another student wrote in opposition to allowing gays to adopt.

Waggoner used recent legal passages to defend his argument, including governmental rulings that decried religious discrimination.

After the op-ed was published, a Christian couple whose child attends the high school, complained.

The school immediately issued an apology – stating Waggoner’s opinion was a “form of bullying and disrespect.”

“Offensive articles cultivating a negative environment of disrespect are not appropriate or condoned by the Waukee School District,” the statement read. “We sincerely apologize to anyone we may have offended and are taking steps to prevent items of this nature from happening in the future.”

But Stevens said what the school system did next was absolutely outrageous. He said the 15-year-old was ordered to the superintendent’s office where he was subjected to hours of meetings and was accused of violating the school’s bullying policy.

“When Mr. Waggoner stated that he did not regret writing it, and that he stood behind his beliefs, Superintendent Carlinson told him that he ‘had got to be one of the most ignorant kids to try to argue with him about this topic,’” Stevens said.

At that point, Stevens said the superintendent told the boy that “we have the power to suspend you if we want to.”

The superintendent allegedly told Waggoner that he was personally offended by Waggoner’s column.

“The superintendent wants everyone to reject homosexuality as normative and homosexual adoption as something that should not be standard practice,” Stevens said. “In doing so, he’s belittling the views and the secular views of many people across this country. He is playing a zero-sum game. He’s not interested in dialogue. He wants to cram his view down the throat of everyone else and will not tolerate an opposing viewpoint.”

*****

This has got to be one of the most outrageous examples of abuse of power and wrongful intimidation that I’ve ever seen coming from public schools, those venerable institutions who promote tolerance and correctly promote anti-bullying campaigns. Here we have an egregious example of one of their own walking all over the first amendment rights of a student who when asked to write the “pro” side of a “pro/con” editorial did so and was then persecuted for doing precisely that. I can only imagine the outrage in the media as demonstrations, protests and legislation is prepared calling for the removal of this wrong-headed bully of a public school administration official. Alec Baldwin will be on Saturday Night Live lampooning the superindendent. I hear that already CNN and 60 Minutes have reporters on the ground and are combing through Mr. Carlinson’s affairs for the dirt necessary to have him fired. The public outcry is expected to be enormous, as it should be.

Only it won’t be. Because it didn’t happen this way.

If you clicked on the link I provided in the second sentence you’ll see that what I posted above is the opposite of the events in question. I’ve changed the names of the three individuals involved, as well as the school district and name of the attorney’s legal counsel. Oh…and one more thing. The student did not actually argue for gay adoptions. He was asked to write an opinion piece against them, which he did. And then he was nailed to the cross for doing so.

I did not write this post to argue for or against gay adoptions.

This is a post about bullying, hypocrisy and abuse of power.

This is what the “chilling effect” on free speech looks like.

The original pro/con editorials in the school newspaper are here.

— 1 —

This should come as a surprise to no one who knows me well: I’m an “I”.

I = Introvert. Given the choice, you’ll devote your social energy to the people you care about most, preferring a glass of wine with a close friend to a party full of strangers. You think before you speak, and relish solitude. You feel energized when focusing deeply on a subject or activity that really interests you. You have an active inner life, and are at your best when you tap into its riches.

How do I know this? Well, I’ve always known it, but I took a little quiz this morning after reading an interview with Susan Cain. She has just authored her first book Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can’t Stop Talking, published just this month. It looks like an interesting book thought I haven’t had the chance to look at it yet and there is no table of contents listed at Amazon or elsewhere. So I find myself wondering as she appears to favor the Eastern traditions of introversion while contrasting it with the West: has she never heard of the Christian monastic traditions of the West? Had she researched Ignatian spirituality at all? Or, like so many other authors I’ve seen promoted lately, does she twist herself into a pretzel in order to avoid Christian tradition and look anywhere at anything to fill that void? I am interested in the book and will probably take a look at it at some point.

— 2 —

All That Remains is a documentary/docu-drama that is currently in production. I became aware of it last fall and is the first film project to which I have ever contributed financially. I was vaguely familiar with the story of Takashi Nagai having read portions of his book The Bells of Nagasaki and looked through A Song For Nagasaki by Fr. Paul Glynn after it was published by Ignatius Press. It was on my Amazon wish list for a long time and once I got a Kindle for Christmas it now resides there, awaiting me.

.  . . on one sunny, August morning in 1945, everything vanishes in a blinding flash of light, and the world is turned into a burning inferno. The second atomic bomb to be used in warfare has just exploded over Nagasaki. Midori (his beloved wife) is one of the estimated 80,000 souls killed instantly.

Now the scientist is forced to turn to God, as he must become a father and a teacher, not just to his two young children, but to an orphaned nation, sick and debilitated by war.

It would be his faith that would guide him back to Atom bombed Nagasaki, and it would be this faith that would inspire him to stay there and help rebuild a city from rubble and ash.

The film project’s official website: All That Remains
The filmmaker’s blog is here.
Help contribute to the making of this film by going here.

— 3 —

Behold, one of the most beautiful churches you’ll ever see. It is the Church of Peace in Świdnicki. It belongs to the Lutheran Church in Poland. Be sure to do a complete 360 look around at this marvelous structure, and don’t forget to “look” straight up!

I have found another panaroma of a small wooden church in Sierakowice (Poland) that is also quite beautiful. The photographer, Jan Zieba, has many more featured on his site.

— 4 —

If you were a member of the media, and you knew that on one day hundreds of thousands of people were gathering in the nation’s capital, fifty thousand more in California, and so on all over the country in order to protest something that claimed 4,000 American lives per day (1,876 of which are African-Americans) at a rate of a death every two minutes each and every day: wouldn’t you cover that?

Not if you’re a part of the media establishment that long ago lost any trace of objectivity.

(Oh yeah, and there was a record turnout in Paris this year, too. Oh well. Yawn.)

Didn’t Time magazine just name The Protester as its Person of the Year a month ago? What’s that you say? Some protests are more equal than others? Gotcha. In that case, here are some suggestions for next year’s Pro Life March:

• Provide free feces and urine for throwing.
• Rename yourselves Occupy Life. Or Occupy the Mall. Best yet try Occupy the Womb. That’ll really fire up the chattering classes.
• Expunge your bowels on the side of a police car.
• Engage in rampant drug use.
• Up twinkles, down twinkles.
• Get in the faces of the police and do whatever you can to get them to harass you, even throwing yourself in front of a slow moving motorcycle, collapsing in mock pain and writhe around on the ground for awhile.
• Wear bandanas over your faces.
• Demand that the government forgive all of your student debt since it’s contributing to the economic woes by participating and advocating the killing of millions of future taxpayers, or something.
• Litter. A lot.
• Get arrested.
• Chant. No, not Gregorian chant. I mean chant inane holdover mantras from the hippy movements of the ‘60s. If that fails scream “The world is watching” and “This is what democracy looks like.” No, it doesn’t make sense, but then it didn’t for the OWS movement either and it got them on the news.
• Form a drum circle.

By doing all of the above the media would be calling it a huge peaceful protest that all Americans must embrace. Right?

Of course I’m being ridiculous to make my point. I know several high school and college aged young adults who traveled to DC last week. I will be peacefully marching along side many of them this weekend here in Lincoln when we hold our local March For Life. And I know, media, I know. There should be no government involvement in our personal lives. Just remember that next time you’re advocating a government ban on Happy Meals, promoting the banning of salt in NYC, or reporting on child obesity. Can’t have the government telling us how to live our lives now, can we?

— 5 —

After all of that I feel like I owe you a palate cleanser. And in that spirit have a wonderful week, sweet peeps.

In an effort to clear my mind by refocusing and reprioritizing some things in my life I deactivated my Facebook account two weeks ago. I didn’t announce to friends that I was going to do it, though I wrote about it on this blog. I never meant it as a permanent move and plan on coming back at some point. But I needed a break. A sabbatical or retreat, if you will. And that’s exactly what it’s been.

Working as an IT professional I am already inundated with a plethora of information each day, whether in my work inbox or in meetings. The flow of information never stops. Add to that the news/commentary/blogs that I read each day and it quickly adds up. I was starting to suffer from IOS and become like Little Billy here:

The truth is that despite my intense love of quiet time and solitude, I am also a very social creature. It’s a constant battle for balance, and the scales had slipped much too far to the social side. When you find yourself constantly checking your smartphone for updates, or logging on from work in between meetings and relying too much on your ability to catch up later, you just set yourself up for a lot of unnecessary stress. And so like anything else in this life, you must have balance, something Pope Benedict recently alluded to while discussing social media:

Even brief posts and viral tweets can carry potent messages when people use those tools – not for spamming or for scanning the latest gossip – but for sharing a real part of themselves, he said.

“In concise phrases, often no longer than a verse from the Bible, profound thoughts can be communicated, as long as those taking part in the conversation do not neglect to cultivate their own inner lives.”

[snip]

Words without reflection and silence without meaning result in confusion, coldness and communication breakdown, he said.

Silence builds meaning, clarity and creativity since “we are better able to listen to and understand ourselves; ideas come to birth and acquire depth;” and people have the time to choose how to best express themselves.

I was amazed by my experience in the first few days of my leaving. If you want to be totally honest with yourself and find out how engrained something is in your life, do without it for two weeks. In those first few days I would find myself habitually reaching for my phone to check in before realizing I had nothing to check. And by habitually I mean every 15-30 minutes. It’s embarrassing really, but as a friend of mine referred to his similar habit, your phone becomes a “crack pipe.”

I also found myself getting way too bent out of shape by some things, mostly political. Normally this has never been an issue, but with the heightened awareness of that world due to it being an election year it’s going to reach a fever pitch. Add to that the fact that we are currently enduring an administration hostile to people of faith and one that once again last week told Catholics to go screw themselves. Change we can believe in? Well, so far the God-King has made our First Amendment rights revokable. How’s that for change? How many more Constitutional rights will he erase if allowed a second term? As Fr. Z writes: “I’d vote for a frozen orange juice can in 2012.”

(And now you see, in one paragraph, why I needed a break from Facebook. I fervently try to avoid posting about politics there, and here for that matter. But it’s becoming increasingly difficult.)

I have little patience for the populist and uninformed knee-jerk things I would see sometimes. Times are very serious, as are the issues. But I was getting too serious. Again, losing my balance as well as my sense of humor. Oddly enough it wasn’t anything political however that cemented my decision, but the frequent posting of one of the most inane and ridiculous YouTube videos to go viral. I’ve written about it as have other much more effectively so I won’t digress here.

So I’ve gone on retreat. And it’s been very cleansing. I miss my friends and family that are online, of course. I was about to type “that are there” in place of “that are online” but stopped myself. Because that’s the problem with the pretend world of social media. For those people aren’t “there”. They are here…in the real world. Just as available, just as accessible, by using the tools we have that have worked for centuries or even the past decade. Letters, phone calls, or emails…all of these options work and work well. Perhaps we don’t receive the same happy pill of instant gratification this way, but we also deepen the pool of thought involved with any communication that passes between us. The brief Facebook status or 140-character Tweet becomes a (hopefully) well thought out email. Or a ten minute phone call. Or, and this is a challenge I know, it can become a personal or intimate letter composed on a few pages.

Or is intimacy what we’re protected against by social media? Hmmm…I’ll save that for another post on another day.

This sabbatical has also allowed me to stay in the moment with those who matter most: my family. I have been able to make strides in my spiritual life. And I’ve spent time catching up on some reading. I am currently 700 pages into Michael O’Brien’s latest book The Father’s Tale. O’Brien is one of my favorite authors and he’s a master storyteller, creating characters with whom you completely lose yourself. Until this book, a modern retelling of both the parable of the prodigal son and the Good Shepherd, I had considered his book Island of the World the best I’d ever read. And it may yet remain in that category, but if the last 300+ pages of The Father’s Tale are as satisfying as the first 700 were I may have a new champion. You know how sometimes you get a real empty feeling for a few days after finishing a book that has a main character or characters with whom you identify? I sense that feeling coming in a few days when I finish this book. I’m not ashamed to say I’ve already found myself weeping out of the blue while propped up on my pillow late at night reading this book. It has a deep heart, and as a father it has touched mine.

The other event that has occurred during this break was a very pleasant surprise. A book that has been gestating in me for over five years and one that I’d outlined has suddenly opened up to me. I began writing a week ago and have already drafted the first few chapters by dedicating 90 minutes each night before bed to its writing. (Incidentally, this is the period of time I spent partially on Facebook prior to the break.) I’m very excited by the progress and would hate to destroy the momentum I’ve attained by going back to Facebook, so for the time being I’ll remain inactive. I’m on pace for 60,000 words and have several chapters to go, but I’m genuinely happy about the progress. Whether it ever is published in book form or in serial form on my blog I cannot say. I won’t jinx myself by saying anything about it, but this photo is a hint. Neener neener.

The involvement necessary for writing this book also means I will not be blogging every day and may be erratic for the next 1-2 months. I’ll be around though with hopefully something meaningful to write or say.

So I will stay on this self-imposed retreat for awhile longer. It really is like going on a weekend retreat that I’ve experienced so many times before at our local Catholic retreat house. When you make a retreat you are doing so to leave one world behind while spending time with God and focusing inwards for a time to rejuvenate yourself before once more engaging the outside world. The initial hours of such a retreat can be jarring as you feel cut off from all the noise and busyness of that outside world. You miss your friends and feel like you’re missing out or even that you’re being forgotten. This last phenomenon is pretty self-centered really, but a common thought. My “retreat” from Facebook has been like that. No longer getting instant feedback or insights into the daily lives of friends I felt cut off at first. I miss them. I wonder if I’m missing out on something. I wonder if they miss or have forgotten about me.

I think I’ll sit down to write a few emails and a letter. And I will, right after I finish up this latest chapter in my book . . .

While heroism abounds around us in forms other than that of the soldier, in our society of celebrity/professional athlete worship and cynical politics the soldier is our most readily available example of this virtue. Flawed yes, he or she is a hero because they quickly will acknowledge their foibles while the aforementioned media personalities do not, or are not prompted by the media to admit them. Soldiers and/or religious persons begin their scrutiny under the assumption of fault and are forced to prove otherwise and climb out of the muck of this perspective. Celebrities start from the opposite end of the scale and upon a pedestal and are more quickly forgiven when they inevitably fall.

Funny ol’ world.

*****

A hero is not fed on sweets,
Daily his own heart he eats;
Chambers of the great are jails,
And head winds right for royal sails.

*****

The heroic soul does not sell its justice and its nobleness. It does not ask to dine nicely, and to sleep warm. The essence of greatness is the perception that virtue is enough. Poverty is its ornament. It does not need plenty, and can very well abide its loss.

— 1 —

Today will be an extremely light “Five” after getting so windy last week. Plus I’m working from home while watching over a second-grader with the flu. I’ve learned something today. I’ve learned that there are several different manifestations of the Power Rangers television shows. All of them are mind-numbingly indecipherable. I had something witty to say about the show but this very minute I received a text from my wife informing me that Jamesetta Hawkins has died. Like an untold number of couples we shared our first dance together as man and wife at our wedding reception to one of her most memorable songs.

The world knew her as Etta James. Rest in peace, Miss Peaches.

— 2 —

I left Facebook last week. No one noticed. Ok, three people did. One was my mom. It’s too late for Superman though.

— 3 —

“Debates” such as this are one of the things I don’t miss about Facebook.

— 4 —

I’ve had a little too much fun dissing Facebook this week. I’ll stop for now as I plan on writing something about the experience later. Let’s just say it’s been an interesting week for me in that regard. It’s now noon and I’m going to go make a sandwich for lunch. The J-man is audibly snoring on the couch from under his blanket, finally getting some much needed sleep. He and my wife have an appointment with the doctor in a few hours. About the time they are there I will be crying while handing over a check to my auto insurance agent. We purchased a school car for our newly-minted 16-year old to use for school and now the real expenses can begin. And there you go: a few days worth of unsolicited Facebook statuses in a single paragraph. Ok, ok…I’m really stopping now.

— 5 —

But before I go, I thought this anecdote from Hunter Baker over at Mere Comments was worth mulling over at the end of the week.

The public schools are going all out to stop bullying these days. My children both attend a public elementary school, so I hear a lot about it.

Yesterday, though, my six year old daughter put together what she is hearing in school with what she has learned about the Christian faith. I was astonished and touched by the truth and clarity of it.

Sitting across the kitchen table while I read and she did her homework, she said, “You shouldn’t be a bully because God didn’t make you to be mean to people. He made you so people wouldn’t be lonely.”

Wisdom so often comes from the mouths of babes, no? See you next week, cool ones.

But I (once again) digress. And thank you MMM for the honor of having been nominated by you for the Kreativ Blogger Award.

For this award I am required to share ten things in random order you may not know about me. Then I will have to pass this award on to at least six or more bloggers. I may not hit that number as I am going to have to spend some more time thinking about this. Not because there are none worthy. Au contraire, there are many. I just don’t get to read as many as I’d like.

Anyhow, here are ten things you may not know about me in a completely random hodge-podge order:

1. My favorite Backyardigan is Pablo. Whenever I sing (or dance…shhh!) along with my young ones to this show they always let dad be Pablo. They just know.

2. I believe that the best way to eat fruit is in a pie.

3. There are moments when the Black Dog overtakes me in a sudden and overwhelming wave. It may be bidden by a song, a story, an image or a thought. I’ve learned over the years how to keep him on a leash and keep my head above water so as not to drown. I first wrote of it publically in June of 2005.

4. I used to wish my life had a musical soundtrack and it seemed music was always accompanying me in my brain. As I’ve gotten older I’m grateful that such a thing never happened. I value the still, silent moments and the dialogues of this life much too much. Though I still rock out now and then. Just not in my skivvies anymore because if I did this would more realistically resemble my reality.

5. Now that I think about it, I am a horrible dancer.

6. I voted for Bill Clinton in 1992. So did my buddy who called me that election eve from his dorm in Minnesota where I could hear partying in the background along with the celebratory clinking of champagne glasses. Twenty years later we’ve both grown up. Bill now lives in Hong Kong as an exile (and because his job is located there), and I soldier on the homefront. Neither of us feel we have representation by either party. Champagne, anyone?

7. After a childhood spent getting destroyed at Scrabble and having given up, I thought I was safe. No so, kimosabe…not so. Now there’s Words With Friends, a smartphone app that I’d managed to elude until this past Christmas break. I loaded it. I play. Thirty years later I still suck at Scrabble. Thanks technology!

8. I’ve always wanted to leap from tree to tree as they float down the mighty rivers with my best girlie by my side. Ok, not really. But I did have a 1st cousin who made his living as a lumberjack.

9. After four decades of devouring heaping mounds of chocolate-frosted sugar bombs and big bowls of ice cream, I had to stubbornly accept the fact that last year I became lactose intolerant. Bye bye Bunny Tracks ice cream. So long Chocolate Marshmallow. (sigh) I still have the occasional bowl of cereal by using rice milk but it just ain’t the same.

10. Red Eye is the only show I regularly DVR and will make time to watch. Greg Gutfeld is such a delightfully witty hobbit. Anything else on Fox, CNN or MSNBC makes me want to move to Hong Kong. I also watch because I’ve got a wee bit ‘o crush on regular guest PAB, or as she’s known on Middle Earth: My Lady Meow Meow, Queen of the Cat People.

In conclusion, I nominate the following bloggers for this award:

From the Shoe Box to the Mother Bored

Mindful-Mod

Maggie Madly Writing

The Daily Bivouac

I’ll keep thinking and update this post with more nominees accordingly.

I’ve never watched the movie The Bucket List though it has been highly recommended to me. I’ve never allowed myself to get caught up in such a concept as I thought the exercise would be setting myself up for a massive letdown. Plus as a father of three any time I have for my own list is pretty limited. I willingly made that decision that my resources (time and money) would be sacrificed as my own in order for them to be utilized by my kids. I don’t say this to be some sort of martyr. I say it willingly as a parent. Yes, my wife and I had dreams and things we wanted to do when we were courting and first married. But having started out poor and burdened by student loans we learned right away to make due with little. Instead of taking cruises, buying McMansions and lots of “things”, we focused instead on getting out of debt and living well within our means so that we’d have something extra for the kiddos. This does not mean there aren’t things I’d love to do or places I long to see. But a lot of them pale in comparison to the hugs I get each day from my smiling daughter, the laughs and “exploding” fistbumps I receive from my 2^nd grader, or my joy in watching my high schooler compete at a high level on the baseball field.

Before I get to my actual bucket list I want to set a parameter or two that my lists items are meant to fulfill. I don’t want to fall into the trap of listing things such as “read all of the works of Shakespeare” that may sound impressive for the sake of impressing. Primarily these things are going to help me meet this one goal: To have lived a life well-lived.

There is a Jewish Proverb that says “There are three things a person should do in one’s lifetime: plant a tree, have a child, write a book.” All three resonate with me as a prescription for living a full life. Who among us does not want to beautify the world somehow?

Plant a tree. There is a single tree at this point in time growing on our property. It’s in the front yard and was brought home on Arbor Day by our oldest when he was in the third grade. It was nothing more than a stick about a foot long. It is now almost eight feet tall and with each successive spring Nolan’s red dogwood tree is covered with more purplish-pink blossoms than the year before. Over the next few years we’ll be planting two more trees as the younger children grow.

Have a child. The drive to continue our species is strong. “Be fruitful and multiply.” And even if we do not ourselves have children there are things we can do for coming generations of man. And that leads us to…

Write a book. We all want to leave behind some memory of ourselves and the things we learned for future generations. Whether by writing an actual book, compiling stories in a journal/email, or bending the ear of a grandchild, niece or nephew, all of this is deep within our essence.

The other goal I have for this list is that all of them aid me in basking in the Glory of God. To immerse myself in a tradition and a culture that calls me beyond the limits of my routine and shows me instead heaven and earth in all the glory of God the Father, Son and Holy Spirit. This does not mean I’ll not honor the small or the modest, but I do wish to avoid the trivial. In other words you won’t find on this list “being the all time champion in Words With Friends.” Please also note that none of these involve the regular use and distraction of a mobile phone.

Go to Rome.
The Eternal City. The city Livy tells us was founded by two twin brothers Romulus and Remus, who not only were abandoned by their parents and put into a basket floating down the River Tiber, but were discovered by a female wolf after the basket ran aground and nursed to health by the same wolf. The city is the center of Roman Catholicism and the location of St. Peter’s Basilica, the Sistine Chapel, and the home of much of the rest of the greatest of pagan and Christian civilizations. This is not a place I will go for a few days to a week. Based upon my conversations with many friends who’ve been fortunate to go I will want at least a month. And if I finish taking in all Rome has to offer with a few days to spare, I will make the journey to Tuscany and finish the rest of my trip drinking wine and watching the sun set.

Visit the Great Cathedrals.
The greatest gifts the northern Europeans gave God and their own descendants were the great cathedrals. Any words I would attempt to utter here could not do them justice. Whether Notre Dame or San Chapelle in Paris, or the cathedrals of Germany including the wonder that is the Cologne Cathedral, to be in such a place whose architecture was designed to lift our eyes, minds and souls towards the heavens has always been a goal. Puritanical American churches don’t do this. Sadly, many modern Catholic churches do not either. I will be attending a wedding at St. Cecilia’s Cathedral in Omaha next month, and while that church is gorgeous to my middle-of-the-United-States eyes, it offers but a small taste of the grandeur in Europe.

Now I will also say that if I never make it to Europe there are other means to experience this upwards glance towards heaven. A favorite shrine I visit often is The Holy Family Shrine, about 30 minutes away via I-80. Sitting in the glass sanctuary on top of the hill and looking westward towards the sun as it sets over miles and miles of vast prairie is something I love to experience. I’ve also enjoyed visits to The Cathedral of the Plains (St. Fidelis), near I-70 in Victoria, Kansas. And lest I forget, my favorite non-man-made open sanctuary is The Badlands in western South Dakota.

Pilgrims walking the Camino de Santiago

Go on a pilgrimage.
The pilgrimage is older than Christianity itself and has its roots in the Old Testament in which pilgrims went up from the towns of Israel to the great feasts celebrated in Jerusalem at the Temple. Outside of going to the Holy Land there is another way to make a pilgrimage: take a long walk. And not just a walk by yourself, but taking one with a bunch of people (strangers and friends) who have nothing in common with you but the fact that they are also taking the long walk. This was portrayed recently in the movie The Way with Martin Sheen and Emilio Estevez. In fact the pilgrimage I want to walk is the same one: the El Camino de Santiago , or Way of St. James. I recently found the book To the Field of Stars: A Pilgrim’s Journey to Santiago de Compostella by Kevin Codd in the bargain bin at my local Catholic bookstore and aim to read it by this spring. To meet this goal I means having to take a third trip to Europe and doing so before my knees give way to old age. But if I can only go to Europe once this just might be the item I’d choose above the others.

Works of mercy.
Had I not been called to be a husband and a father I believe I’d have been a monk, a missionary, or both. When I was little I always admired those who lived their lives for others, especially the poor, in foreign lands far from their homes. I’m over forty, and I still feel a twinge of that calling. The poor, disabled, hungry, sick, blind, widow and the orphan: these are the real treasures of the Church. Since hearing Katie Davis tell her story in a radio interview and again in her book I’ve felt that call once more. I felt it when reading the story of Fr. Tom Hagan in the aftermath of the devastating earthquake in Haiti. For now, while unable to visit in person and put my own hands to the plow I find other means to support those on the frontlines. But of course the poor are among us locally, and a vital part of “living a life well-lived” is to find a way to help the least of these. And so I continue to serve the occasional day at the local soup kitchen, but look to any of the myriad of other ways to fulfill the other corporal and spiritual works of mercy that abound.

Take a Poustinia.
Poustinia is a Russian word that literally means “desert.” The concept of a poustinia is that a person goes apart from their community to fast and pray in solitude for 24 hours or more. The only book taken to poustinia is Scripture and one immerses themselves in the Word of God. Added to this is fasting on bread and water. The intention of poustinia is “always for others, for the needs of the Church, the world and those who have asked us to pray for them.” You can read more about poustinia here. I only became aware of the concept last year, but am interested in making at least one. While I’ve gone on silent 2-3 day Ignatian retreats, I really want to make a longer retreat and am looking to do so here and/or here. Of course I would also love to buy some secluded land somewhere in South Dakota with a cabin and do my best imitation of Thoreau and do nothing but write. But in the meantime I figure one of these retreats or a poustinia will be the more likely and affordable option. And what is more valuable than prayer, really?

Make peace with God.
One of the oddest phrases that I heard once I became Catholic was “to die a good death.” To die well. We even have a Patron of a Happy Death in Saint Joseph with a full-blown novena and everything! But I can now think of no other goal more striving for in this life. Since we’re all going to kick the proverbial bucket, we might as well do it in style: prayed up, having given our final good confession, anointed with the holy oils of the Last Rites, full of grace and at peace. That is the way to begin the ultimate pilgrimage, which of course, heaven is.

The last thing I wanted to touch upon in all of this is the subject of regret. Last year I read a post that listed the top five regrets of the dying gathered by a woman who worked in palliative care. They are:

1. “I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me.”
2. “I wish I didn’t work so hard.”
3. “I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings.”
4. “I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends.”
5. “I wish that I had let myself be happier.”

The most common regret of all was #1. #2 was primarily the regret of males, but increasingly women are citing it too, I suppose because of more and more women being breadwinners in the family.

Another way to look at these regrets is that by turning them around you can see how they tie into a lie that the devil, the world, or even we ourselves, tells us over and over.

1. “You can’t be happy without the approval of others.”
2. “Your greatest fulfillment lies in your career.”
3. “God won’t help you stand up for what’s true and good and right.”
4. “You don’t have time to spend with those you love—look at all the important things on your to-do and your bucket lists!”
5. “Stop trying to find God’s purpose for your life and just do what people expect of you.”

So there you have it: my bucket list and the list of regrets to avoid. Do I still want to do other things such as take a tour and see a ballgame at Fenway Park? You bet yer sweet bippy I do!

As Estevez’s character says to his father in The Way: “You don’t choose a life dad, you live one.” But the #5 regret shows us that happiness is indeed a choice. In this way we are able to choose the life we’ll lead.

I choose to live my life as it comes. I pray I live, and choose, wisely.

[Hat tips to Mark Shea and Jennifer Fulwiler for their hand in inspiring me to think upon these things.]

I had meant to send this out a few weeks ago but was simply too busy with writing other things to get it finished. And this in a nutshell is what the #1 item on my list for 2012 involves: time. Over the past six weeks I’ve learned that our loved ones, specifically children, need our time no matter what their ages be they four, eight or sixteen. It’s true that the younger ones are easier to dedicate time to because they are more apt to snuggle up with you and their pink blanket or smother you with unlimited hugs and kisses while the teenagers will roll their eyes and sigh a lot. Nevertheless time is what they want from you and it is what they all deserve. In 2012 I hope to spend more of that time with my oldest child but also with the others in my life who love me enough to desire the same.

Here’s my list of goals for a 2012:

• Make a morning offering each day. Simply kneeling down each morning to offer up the day ahead for God’s glory. This simple act will set the tone for my ability to have the energy to live out the following goals.
• Set aside time for at least 15 minutes of silent daily prayer. A little “one-on-one” fact time with God, whether at home or in church before the Blessed Sacrament.
• Get in at least 15 minutes of spiritual reading each day. Time spent in Scripture as well as any of the dozens of spiritual classics that I own. I bought a new commentary on The Imitation of Christ by Thomas a Kempis that I plan to read, as well as a few on Ignatian spirituality.
• Attend Holy Mass at least once per week and receive Holy Communion in the state of grace. I already do this, but my goal is to walk to St. Mary’s from my office at least once a week to attend Mass at noon.
• Pray the Angelus or Regina Coeli prayer each day at noon.
• Pray the Holy Rosary each day. Why? I’ll let Lynne, one of the Catholic Sistas, tell you. She does a fantastic job in Of P90X and the Holy Rosary. You really must read it.
• Make a brief examination of conscience each night before bed. An excellent bookend to the Morning Offering in order to close the day with an attitude of gratitude and of responsibility for actions taken.

"The Angelus" by Jean-Francois Millet, 1857

These first seven are items I took from a list written by Fr. John McCloskey. To it I will add going to confession once a month. But you said you wanted to spend more time with your kids, Jeff. How can you do that by adding all of these things each day? Well, if you add all of them up (except for the weekly Holy Mass) they will take a little over an hour out of each day. Plus some of these things I am already doing, if not more when you add in an occasional Morning or Evening Prayer from The Divine Office. So the additional time is not really an issue. In order to ensure that it’s not an issue I’m going to open more time in my daily schedule. How? By deleting my Facebook account for one thing. I’ve attempted to only check it during business hours off and on, but that’s just stealing time from my employer. And since I don’t always have my laptop or PC on at home I wind up spending way too much time engrossed in the screen on my Droid. This morning while walking back from Starbucks to the office I watched a woman get plowed into by a guy on a bicycle. He’d tried to avoid her but she was too busy checking her Facebook (she admitted this to me as I helped her up). A good friend of mine recently deactivated his Facebook account when he had been too busy checking it while giving a practice spelling test to his first grader and realized he had no idea whether his son had spelled any of the words correctly. I’ve tried for months to limit my time spent there, but repeatedly fail. So it’s got to go. Will I come back? Probably. But I need to go cold turkey for awhile. It will go black this weekend at some point.

I want to give my family and especially my children more of my time. I also want them to get the best, most “at peace” version of me that I can give them. The seven items above are designed to do this by providing a solid foundation for the day, the mind and the soul. It is from personal experience in the past “pre-Facebook” that I know this to be true.

Besides, it’s not like I’m falling off the grid. I’ve still got five separate email accounts(!) and this blog through which I may be reached. Just a few short years ago that was more than enough. It’s too much in fact, but it’s reality.

Now, what things am I going to try to avoid in 2012? Aside from Mayan Prophecies and reality TV I plan on avoiding:

• Comparing myself to others.
• Going “should” on myself.
• Trying to get people to like me.
• Interrupting others.
• Worrying about how I look.
• Working constantly.
• Failing to give people a break.
• Complaining about minor illnesses.
• Being a jerk.
• Avoid doing the right thing.
• Making fun of people.
• Being too hard on myself.
• Politics.

Once again, I’m lifting the bulk of this list from elsewhere but I’m incorporating them as my own. I don’t presently do a few of these but I decided to keep them on the list as reminders. I added “Politics” because 2012 is shaping up to be the most polarizing, ugly and nasty year in American politics that we’ve seen in quite awhile. Americans seem to politicize everything and because of this identity politics is rampant. Oh, you believe in x? Than you must be for y. There is a real effort to eliminate the ability for any person of faith to comment or hold a position on an issue. If he or she does, she is accused of dragging their religious beliefs into the public square. It is madness and an attempt to whitewash history. Each generation has vainly thought it was the “most enlightened” generation and that all who came before were ignoramuses who lived in the dark ages. A line spoken by Vizzini in The Princess Bride always comes to my mind when I consider this:

Vizzini: “Let me put it this way. Have you heard of Plato, Aristotle, Socrates?”
Man in Black: “Yes.”
Vizzini: “Morons.”

If you recall that arrogance didn’t serve Vizzini so well. It doesn’t serve us either.

Tony Esolen wrote something pithy recently while discussing American politics that I copied down as it struck home to me while drafting this piece. He said

When one does not believe in a transcendent God, to whose goodness and wisdom none of us can measure up, then the Next Big Thing in sight becomes a god. I’ve been arguing that there are three candidates for Next Big Thing. In my mind they go by the names Baal, Pharaoh, and Adam: Nature, the State, and the Self. The Left now worships at the altars of all three, by turns. The secular Right worships at the altar of Adam, with sometimes a nod to Baal, and a nod to Pharaoh when he’s on the warpath. A pox on ‘em all.

Indeed. I see too many of us making a god out of the state. History is replete with this and sadly it’s happening again.

In 2012 we’ll celebrate the 600th anniversary of the birth of St. Joan of Arc (Jan. 6, 1412), the 200th anniversary of the birth of Charles Dickens (Feb. 7, 1812), and the 100th anniversary of the opening of that baseball shrine: Fenway Park (Apr. 20, 1912). We will also commemorate the 100th anniversary of the sinking of the Titanic and of the over 1,500 who lost their lives on that voyage on April 12, 1912.

It will be a year of reading books of course. Among the many I plan to read there are three major works I’ve put off for a few years and my goal is to finish at least two of them. The Theology of the Body by Pope John Paul II, Les Miserables by Victor Hugo, and The Brothers Karamazov by Fyodor Dostoyevsky. I’d started Brothers a few years ago but stopped after a hundred pages. I plan to start over. Of this giant among literature Simcha Fisher recently wrote:

I wish more people would give The Brothers Karamazov by Dostoyevsky a chance. It’s intimidating because it’s so long and it’s A Classic, but it’s surprisingly modern, and has everything you could wish for in a novel: unforgettable characters, crazy stories, laughter, blood, tears, sex, God, monks, prostitutes, puppies, etc. This book will change you for the better, if it doesn’t kill you first.

How can you not want to read that book?

It will be a year of baseball, birthdays, and blogging. Oh, and a little bourbon thrown in to smooth out the year.

And that’s my 2012.

What’s on your list? What do you just know you can do?

— 1 —

The next two of my “five” should probably have been written as a stand-alone piece but I’m being lazy today. I blame it on the fact that this is the first five-day work week I’ve had for over three weeks due to the holidays. I wish I wasn’t feeling so lazy because aside from what’s written below I’ve got a lot on my mind worth saying. (Yes, really.) I plan on finally finishing my little piece on resolutions for the New Year (perhaps one of them should be on procrastination, no?) and there’s something I’ve been kicking around that compares American politics to porn. I’m not sure that one will ever see the light of day, but we’ll see how brave I feel later on. And finally, there’s something I’m writing on the prodigal son that’s very much from my heart.

Blogging every day since the First Sunday of Advent took a bit more out of me than I thought it would. I liken it to the fatigue all athletes feel when they renew their workout regimen after some time away. Maybe it was my spring training. In any event I plan to continue…I’m just going to pause for a little rest in the meantime.

— 2 —

I’m going to clear my throat a little so I ask that you grant me this one indulgence. This video is making the rounds, being posted on my Facebook and even sent to me by email. I’ve watched it a few times and downloaded the text that he (Jefferson Bethke) has made available. It has become a manifesto of sorts for the “spiritual-but-not-religious” crowd. I was preparing a line-by-line commentary on the video, but found that a few of my favorite writers have already answered brilliantly. Most, if not all, of what I was writing to this point has already been covered by these two. I would encourage you not only to read what they write, but for a change I’m also going to recommend you read through the comments posted afterwards. Usually I’ll avoid comboxes like the plague due to the ignorance and vitriol that can be present there, but in these instances they are very helpful and illuminating.

Marc Barnes at Bad Catholic:

A common theme throughout the video is our man’s complaint that religion is just behavior modification, a list of rules to follow, and thus doesn’t get to the core of the matter — the call to love Christ as a response to his sacrifice on the cross. First of all, this is an absolutely valid critique of what religion should not be. If it is just a set of rules and not a love affair, it is dead. You can’t have works without faith any more than you can have faith without works. But the idea that following rules is inherently contradictory to loving Christ flies in the face — yet again — not of religion, but of Christ. He says, “If you love me, keep my commandments.” Love of Christ requires obedience to his commands. You cannot have one without the other.

Marcel LeJeune at Aggie Catholics:

I can’t see how Jesus would hate a set of beliefs, a moral code or ritual observances, when he came to teach us these things. The sermon on the Mount, the Last Supper, the parables, etc. all teach us these things. So, Jesus certainly doesn’t hate them.

Furthermore, Jesus wouldn’t want us to be taught these things and then not follow them or observe the practice of them.

So, the problem isn’t with religion, but hypocrisy – saying you are a Christian and living far from him. This is a different argument.

— 3 —

As Marcel wrote there are a lot of things wrong with this man’s message. However, like Marcel and Marc I do agree that he does get some things absolutely spot-on correct. First and foremost among them is that hypocrisy is wrong. Being a false witness is wrong. Hiding behind religious practices instead of accepting Jesus into your heart is wrong. Outward actions to impress others is wrong. Rules, not relationship, is wrong.

I think the young man is sincere and passionate even if I don’t agree with him. As a former Protestant myself who did think and feel as he did when I was much younger, and who cast an especially wary eye towards Rome and the Catholic faith, there were a lot of questions and issues that I needed to have researched and answered. Because to me Catholics certainly appeared to be “going though the motions” and doing whatever it was they did in order to earn points to get to heaven. But this can be said for persons of all faiths. Each question I had was answered, and once I was reconciled to the facts and not the misrepresentations so easily and often thrown around by anti-Catholics, it became the most natural and easiest decision I’ve ever made in this life. Once my head accepted it, my heart followed.

Do I get caught up sometimes in the ritual or the “habits”? Yes I do. I’m human. But I’m careful to be aware of it and blessed with others in my life who will point it out to me when I do so. The most important thing, the only thing, that’s truly important and the center of my faith is Jesus Christ. But everything I’ve found within the tenets and practices of my faith are tools that, when used correctly, are meant to point me to Him. (The Mass, the Rosary, etc.) For example, if you fail to follow the blueprints even while using the tools correctly when working on a project at home or in business you will end up off in the weeds. Or if you follow the blueprint but are terrible at using the tools you’ll be in the ditch. The same may be said regarding faith and religion.

Beginning in John 6:22 Jesus gives what is known as The Bread of Life Discourse. It is a passage of the scriptures often ignored by Protestants and revered by Catholics. After doing some some steady teaching Jesus tells the Jews who are they to “stop murmuring” amongst themselves. He goes on:

I am the bread of life. Your ancestors ate the manna in the desert, but they died; this is the bread that comes down from heaven so that one may eat it and not die. I am the living bread that came down from heaven; whoever eats this bread will live forever; and the bread that I will give is my flesh for the life of the world.” (Jn 6:48-41)

[snip]

“Amen, amen, I say to you, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you do not have life within you. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him on the last day. For my flesh is true food, and my blood is true drink. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me and I in him. Just as the living Father sent me and I have life because of the Father, so also the one who feeds on me will have life because of me. This is the bread that came down from heaven. Unlike your ancestors who ate and still died, whoever eats this bread will live forever.” (Jn 6:53-58)

Jesus, the man whom Jefferson Bethke states “hates religion” and rituals, is establishing a ritual while teaching in the synagogue in Capernaum. It is a ritual Catholics around the world have participated in for over 2,000 years. After saying these things many of his disciples who were listening said “This saying is hard; who can accept it?” (Jn 6:60) And as a result many of them returned to their former way of life and left him. (Jn 6:66) Think about that for a minute: these were disciples who had been with Jesus for awhile now. They’d personally seen with their own eyes the miracles he had performed up to this time. They had heard his teachings. They were able to touch, laugh, eat, rest and talk with the man. And yet this teaching and this ritual were simply too much for them and they left. Because it was “hard.”

It’s still hard today. Jefferson Bethke and others like him are still murmuring amongst themselves and trying to have it both ways.

— 4 —

If you’re still with me (and I hope you are) I think you’ll like this. While pausing in the rest I mentioned earlier I plan to use the downtime to include this prayer in my own prayerbook. This is wonderful! In his blog on this prayer Paul Wharton says it belongs in the Hall of Fame for Prayers. I wholeheartedly agree. Print out a copy of your own and join me, won’t you?

Likrat Shabbat
by Rabbi Jack Reimer

We cannot merely pray to you, O God, to end war;
For we know that You have made the world in a way
That man must find his own path to peace.
Within himself and with his neighbor.
We cannot merely pray to You, O God, to end starvation;
For You have already given us the resources
With which to feed the entire world,
If we would only use them wisely.
We cannot merely pray to You, O God, to root out prejudice;
For You have already given us eyes
With which to see the good in all men,
If we would only use them rightly.
We cannot merely pray to You, O God, to end despair,
For You have already given us the power
To clear away slums and to give hope,
If we would only use our power justly.
We cannot merely pray to You, O God, to end disease;
For You have already given us great minds
With which to search out cures and healing,
If we would only use them constructively.
Therefore we pray to You instead, O God,
For strength, determination and will power,
To do instead of just pray,
To become instead of merely to wish.

— 5 —

Forgive my tongue-in-cheek here, but I’ve been thinking along these lines since the Tebow phenomenon launched into orbit.

And full disclosure: I like Tim Tebow and have enjoyed watching everything he’s done this year. But I’ve been a Patriots fan for over 25 years. In the spirit of Tebow’s 316 yards passing last week I predict Tom Brady will throw for 666 yards on Saturday night in Foxboro.

Just funnin’ y’all. See you soon.

We are truly fortunate to have these prayer warriors here so close. Their order has convents in 22 countries, including four locations here in the States: Philadelphia, Corpus Christi, St. Louis and Lincoln. I’ve been present when they’ve prayed the Compline, or Night Prayers, from The Divine Office and found it most comforting. I’ve written of this before, but once I went along with a friend of mine who needed to deliver a few things to the convent. We were met in the convent entrance/office by the head of the order. A tiny woman with clear, sparkling eyes, she smiled with interest when John introduced me. Those eyes then seemed to bore deep into my own when she assured me that the Sisters had been praying for me at the request of others, and for my own intentions that I’d delivered to the prayer box as well. “Do not worry about such things,” she said. “God will see you through.” I was approximately two feet taller than her, but at that moment she towered over me and all I could seem to force out of my throat was a squeaky “Thank you, sister.” A more humbling experience I’d be hard-pressed to recall.

I’m not big on New Year’s resolutions, but I think it’s beyond time I went back to that beautiful chapel. While writing this I blocked out some on my schedule for a visit after work later this week.

This is a new DVD presentation produced by a friend of mine about the Pink Sisters of Adoration, an order of nuns more affectionately known by us here as “The Pinks.” The video runs for about 15 minutes and is narrated by Msgr. Nemec. It’s a little dry and very matter-of-fact, but it is an excellent presentation about the inhabitants of an oasis of peace right here in Lincoln, Nebraska.

LIVE quietly with God.
WORK gladly for God.
VIEW things from God’s viewpoint.
TALK things over with God.
GLOW with zeal for the glory of God.
FIND your joy in God.
REST deep in the heart of God.

—Mother Mary Michaele, Co-Founderess of the Holy Spirit Adoration Sisters